Love Is Not Easily Angered
Post date: Jul 31, 2017 9:29:40 PM
I recently began the journey of obtaining a graduate degree in the field of counseling (and, quite a journey it’s been--all prayers appreciated!). One of the most interesting things I’ve learned up to this point is that anger is a secondary emotion. To help explain what that means, I’ve included this quote:
“...we tend to resort to anger in order to protect ourselves from or cover up other vulnerable feelings...we might first feel afraid, attacked, offended, disrespected, forced, trapped, or pressured.” (to read more regarding this quote, click here).
Learning that anger is not a stand-alone emotion so to speak, was quite a revelation. I had never taken the time to really evaluate underlying reasons for my anger within myself. If I was angry, surely it had to be someone else’s fault! In true human form, instead of allowing God to shine His light within me, I would often resort to blaming others and try to figure out the most creative and gratifying way to vent my frustrations. That said, let’s juxtapose our new context of the root of anger (which is usually hurt, fear or another deeply vulnerable emotion) with God’s truth about this aspect of love--”love is not easily angered.” Not being easily angered presents quite a dilemma when we encounter very trying or difficult situations doesn’t it? I’m tempted to ask, “What about those times when the reason for me being easily angered seems really justified? Do I get a free pass, then?”
One of the things that I find most amazing about the life God calls us to live is that although he calls us to live in a way that is focused on giving to others, He doesn’t call us to do so blindly. He calls us to do this from a place where we are aware of Him and ourselves. In other words, being God-aware and self-aware, yet other-focused. As we become more aware of our own hurts, insecurities and failures, we become more aware of how much we need God. When we lean into our need for Him, He heals our broken places, and loves us in a way that goes far beyond and past our anger and pain. As this happens, we then develop the capacity to love others the way He asks us to. As we allow God to continue pouring His great love over us, we develop the ability to pour this love out on others, responding to others from this place of abundant love and grace, rather than reacting in anger.
With these things in mind, are you beginning to notice a pattern in all of these 1 Corinthians “love” statements? Have you noticed how these behaviors that we either do or do not want to emulate in our love for one another have a lot more to do with our own hearts? As we go through this month of August, when we have the opportunity to become easily angered or irritated, let’s take the time to pause and evaluate what the real reason behind our anger might be. Let’s invite God to help us work through those difficult places in our hearts with the help of the Holy Spirit, so that we may love others in a way that reflects His heart.
Related Videos*
Love is Not Easily Angered or Provoked - Dan Gallagher
The Healing of Anger - Timothy Keller
God's Anger Management Plan - Chip Ingram
*Some of the videos on our Deeply Rooted site are from RightNow Media. If you'd like to register for free access to RightNow Media content, click here.